


Not Good Enough / Drenched

by Altatari, RonnieSilverlake



Series: Meteor Shower [1]
Category: Ao no Exorcist | Blue Exorcist
Genre: Angst, F/M, Gen, Humor, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-10
Updated: 2012-10-10
Packaged: 2017-11-16 01:06:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/533795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Altatari/pseuds/Altatari, https://archiveofourown.org/users/RonnieSilverlake/pseuds/RonnieSilverlake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shiemi is finally back from winter holidays, but the state she finds Rin in is less than favourable. In her attempt to help him out, they spend an afternoon together - an afternoon full of mishaps.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Good Enough / Drenched

Rin wasn’t really paying attention where he was going; wherever he looked, he only saw red. The hardest thing to decide was whether he was more angry than sad, or the other way around.

Only now, that it seemed like breaking apart, did he realize how much he actually relied on Kirigakure Shura. Despite her constant verbal fights with Yukio, and her goofy attitude, Rin had grown to like her very much; she was almost like an older sister. Knowing that she was sort of brought up by Fujimoto Shirou only made that feeling all the more solid for him — but now, he didn’t know what to think.

 _I hate you, I hate you, I hate you_ , he kept repeating as he went, through the school compound, till he reached the fountain they used to hang out around between classes. It was empty now, since it was winter, apart from the small puddle on the bottom that was gathering as the rain fell. Rin plopped down on the side, hiding his face in his hands. _I hate you_.

It was a good thing it was raining, because Rin could tell himself he wasn’t crying; no, not at all, he was too angry to cry anyways. How could Shura ditch his father that easily? Did she not have feelings? Did none of it matter? Rin was confused; so confused that it took an enormous effort to think clearly. There was no opportunity to either of them anymore; Shirou was dead, after all — so why did he feel like Shura was throwing an opportunity away, an opportunity he would have died for? There was none, and yet it felt like that.

_I hate you._

It took him long minutes to calm down enough to realize that maybe it was the other way around. That perhaps Shura didn’t not have feelings — perhaps she had too many of them. But what was she thinking? Rin had heard her with his own ears as she had told Yukio that, by bottling your feelings up, you make yourself vulnerable. Shura wasn’t supposed to be vulnerable, was she? Of course, nobody was invincible… but for Rin, who had never truly stopped to think about it before, Shura had certainly seemed as if she were.

 _And anyways_ , he thought, his teeth still gritted together, _why do all of them just push me away like that? No matter what I offer, they refuse everything!_ Yukio had long closed himself off from him, and now Shura was doing the same thing. Rin hated it, he hated it so much it was unbearable.

_I hate you._

_No… I hate myself._

***

A pink umbrella bobbed jubilantly across the grounds of True Cross Academy. Although the surroundings were dreary and dank, it couldn’t put a damper on the mood of the kimono-clad girl. For just a second she stopped, pulling out a small notepad and marking off several items that had previously written down. _..And with that last delivery to Tsubaki-sensei, everything is complete for today._ Shiemi smiled to herself, pocketing the notepad. She knew that upon her return, her mother would be very pleased to see how quickly she had delivered the day’s inventory.

Just mere months ago she would have never dared to set foot out of her Granny’s garden, much less willingly interact with others. To do both of those things with little to no issue felt great. Such a feat probably wouldn’t seem like much of an accomplishment to some, but to Shiemi it was like learning to ride a bike and finally getting to cast off your training wheels. Confidence! What a wonderful feeling it was.

It was at that very moment, however, that something out of the corner of her eye grabbed her attention. Turning fully, bright green eyes took in the sight of another darting across the campus green, and heading in the direction she had just come from. Though, it wasn’t just anyone… it was Rin! The moment she recognized her friend, Shiemi’s smile widened. With the slight break for the holidays, she hadn’t gotten a chance to see either of the twins in quite some time. So, what a coincidence it was to run across him today. Though, after raising a hand to wave and his name resting on the tip of her tongue, she suddenly hesitated.

Wait…

Perhaps it was the way he perched so dejectedly on the edge of the fountain, or the manner in which he cradled his head in his hands— whatever it was, Shiemi knew that _something_ wasn’t quite right. The smile on her face slowly fell, eyebrows now furrowing in concern. What could have happened? Did he have a fight with Yukio? _…Was he hurt?_

These uncertainties swirled in her head, willing her feet to carry her in his direction. After all, what kind of friend would she be to not make sure he was alright? So she went, slowing her pace only when she finally approached him. It wasn’t often that the tamer girl witnessed him so upset, after all. The least she could do was to help shield him from the onslaught of raindrops, and so she did, holding out the umbrella so that the both of them were somewhat covered from where she stood.

“R-Rin..?”

***

Completely submerged in thoughts and feelings swirling around, Rin only realized he had company when he suddenly stopped feeling the constant drops of rain on the back of his head. And then, not a moment later, he heard a voice calling out to him. A voice he would have been incredibly happy to hear at any other given time… but to have to face Shiemi in such a state wasn’t something he really liked.

Of course, Shiemi was among the very few people that accepted Rin fully for who (or rather, what) he was, and he was more than grateful for her for that, but… it wouldn’t have felt right to put his problems on her. She already had enough to deal with, having to suddenly adjust to school and people, while she had been completely isolated most of her life, and this mess he was in was something that was his own fault entirely, so he had to solve it by himself, too.

Of course, for now, he had absolutely no idea how he was going to go about that, but that didn’t change anything.

Rubbing at his face, he finally looked up at her with a none too honest smile, praying that his wet bangs falling into his face would be enough to hide the redness of his eyes. “Shiemi!” he greeted her, his voice holding its usual warmth even while it missed the cheerfulness. It was Shiemi, after all. And he had missed her. “Took you long enough — how were the holidays?”

He glanced at the umbrella Shiemi was holding over the both of them, then back at her. “Haha, thank you… but I don’t think it makes much of a difference now…”

***

She would be lying if she said she wasn’t slightly taken aback by the warm greeting and inquiry from the other.

Typical Rin.

Even when something was clearly going wrong, he still managed to pull himself together and acted as if everything was alright. Shiemi was worried, obviously, but she wouldn’t pry. If there was anything she had learned about him over the past few months, it was that Rin would share things on his own terms and his own time, **if** at all.

The question of “are you okay?” threatened to spill from her lips, but instead she shifted her attention to the overall condition of the boy infront of her. He was soaked through and through, her eyes taking in the rainwater dripping from his bangs and just how disheveled he seemed in general. When he thanked her for the umbrella, she realized that her efforts didn’t quite help as much as she had wanted. However, _that_ was something she could easily fix.

Doing her best to maintain her hold the umbrella, Shiemi used her free hand to pull the the excess shawl from around her and plopped it unceremoniously on top of his head and shoulders. Instead of giving him a chance to object, she then proceeded to sit next to him on the fountain’s edge, still holding the umbrella between the two of them. “It wouldn’t be a lot of fun if you caught a cold right before classes begin again, right?” She glanced over at him for a moment, a slight smile upon her features.

 _Could demons even catch colds?_ No matter. If he was going to sit out here in the rain, then she certainly wouldn’t let him do it alone. ”My holiday was fine, but I’m really glad to see everyone again! It was …kind of lonely after while.” She murmured, fumbling with a fold on her kimono. “How about yours? I hope you had a restful break as well!”

***

Shiemi didn’t ask anything. Rin was _almost_ surprised — probably because he quickly remembered how _he_ himself had kept bugging Shura not such a long while before —, but then he remembered this was Shiemi. He shook his head slightly, now annoyed at himself, raking through his messy hair with his fingers. He could see she wanted to ask — but she didn’t, and that just made her presence strangely all the more comforting.

Yet, he couldn’t help but let out a surprised sound as she suddenly just decided to sit down by his side. “But—” He fell silent quickly, not knowing how he was supposed to finish a sentence he didn’t know what to say with. “I was already soaked, so… but now your clothes are wet, too,” he mumbled, looking at her from the corner of his eyes. Trying to get together at least a little bit of his cheery demeanor was a really hard thing for him to do at this very moment.

“I’ve had worse,” he said absently upon her telling him about catching a cold. Seriously, could he even catch a cold? He hadn’t caught one when he spent hours on a rooftop on his birthday in only pants and a shirt, so why would he now?

As if wanting to prove himself wrong, a sudden shiver ran down his spine, and he rubbed at his own arms, looking over at her again, wondering how he could put his reply into words. “Yeah… it’s great to see you again,” he agreed, rubbing at his cheek once more — it was a spontaneous movement, even though there wasn’t any moisture on his skin anymore. “Ours was okay too, I guess… we went back home and stuff…”

***

**“But—”**

But? Shiemi looked over at Rin expectantly, when his voice trailed off. Was he going to… ? Though, that train of thought promptly derailed when he blamed himself for the fact that her clothing had gotten wet. It wasn’t quite the response she had been expecting, more so— hoping to hear and she frantically tried to wave away his concern.

“A-ah! It’s fine… really!!” And truly, to her it was. “….what are friends for, right?” She smiled to herself, staring down at her lap. Even if she was doing something as little as braving the rain to share an umbrella, it undoubtedly made her happy that she could do something for someone else. The edges of her kimono were a little damp and her cheeks were slightly flushed from the chill in the air, but otherwise the tamer was no worse for wear. Not that she’d admit otherwise, anyhow.

As he responded to her sentiments about catching a cold, Shiemi only half heard what the other had said, inconspicuously attempting to warm her hands in the folds of her kimono. If anything, the statement had been more or less an excuse for the girl to express some of the concern she had been feeling, all the while skirting around the real issue that he’d been upset over.

“I’m glad.” She noted, finally breaking her silence when he spoke about how him and Yukio had gone home for break. “I can imagine it was nice to be somewhere familiar for the holidays.” At least, she knew she couldn’t imagine staying in the dorms during a time like that, especially when it was just the two of them on their own.

***

Rin had always been amazed at how Shiemi could maintain such a simple view of things. Some people may have viewed it as naiveté, but, to Rin, it was something admirable. It was as if listening to her opinion cleared his own confused thoughts, making it simple enough to bear. After all, Shiemi was right; it had been nice to be back at the place they had called home for fifteen years. Rin should have been able to view it as nice; it was familiar, and they had friends back there — more like family, really, as they had grown up with the priests of the fane. Perhaps in a few years, they could view it as such, but, for now, all that had happened in the past year was still too _raw_ , too painful not to keep remembering it, especially while being at the place where Shirou had lost his life.

Looking at Shiemi again as she told him it was fine, he couldn’t help but still feel guilty about it. He may have had a strong immune system, but, agreement or not, if Shiemi caught a cold because of this, he wasn’t going to be able to look into a mirror for a while. Only now did he fully realize that Shiemi had given him a shawl; he had been too deep in thought to notice till now, and that made a somewhat familiar warmth creep onto his cheeks.

Coming to a quick decision, he stood up from the edge of the fountain, grabbing Shiemi’s hand and pulling her with him in the process with the same movement. “I think you have a bigger chance of catching a cold than me,” he declared. The feel of her small hand in his — _ice cold_ — just confirmed what he was saying. “I’ll walk you home, how’s that?”  
He was glad to find that this time, his smile was a lot more honest than the previous one. It still wasn’t that giddy sort of grin he usually maintained, but it was a start. He started to walk, pulling her with him, also snatching the umbrella away in the process — it was easier for him to hold, since he was the taller one.

The rain kept falling around them as if it weren’t even wintertime but the saddest of Autumn. But Rin didn’t feel like crying anymore; not with Shiemi by his side. All he felt was… uncertainty.

“Say, Shiemi, if you…”

He stopped himself in the middle of the sentence, glancing away as they walked across a bridge. What was the point of asking such a thing? He knew what Shiemi would reply — of all the people, he didn’t doubt _her_. So, wanting to hear that reply only for the sake of hearing it… it would have done no good. It would have just made Shiemi worry about him furthermore. There was no reason.

So why did he still want to ask it so much?

***

A startled yelp signified the girl’s surprise, as Rin suddenly pulled her up from the fountain’s edge. When he mentioned the prospect of her falling ill, Shiemi found herself wanting to protest. “But… ” After all, this whole thing… it wasn’t about her. It wasn’t like she was a fragile little kid anymore. Though, the moment he slipped his hand over her own, she knew that he was right. It was starting to feel significantly colder out. In the end, seeing the smile on his face coupled with the sudden burst of rash behavior was enough to signal to the girl that Rin was starting to behave more like his usual self. That made her happy, considering it was a big difference from the state she had first found him in. So with a smile, she relinquished her hold on the umbrella ~~not so much by choice, mind you..~~ and allowed herself to be led along.

Shiemi soon slipped into her own thoughts, as silence enveloped the both of them. However…

**“Say, Shiemi, if you…”**

The sound of his voice grabbed her attention immediately. The girl looked up at him as if anticipating his next words, but he had already turned away. Just as he’d begun to open himself up to her, he closed himself off again. Just like that.

She opened her mouth for a split second as if to respond, but once more she hesitated. Why couldn’t she just say something? She couldn’t help but think back to the first time she’d met Rin. Back then when she had lay there in her garden, wallowing in self-pity and afflicted by a demon, Rin hadn’t hesitated to take action. He had known her for all of what, half of a day? Shiemi frowned, mentally noting the number of months that had passed since then. Deep down, she knew it was downright cowardly of her to think of herself as his friend and yet she was afraid to say something so simple. Although he did seem to be in better spirits than before, she could still tell there was _something_ there.

“You know… Rin….”

Finally mustering the courage, the girl gradually slowed her pace, until she had come to a dead halt upon the bridge. Her hand was still firmly grasped in his, and she tugged at his arm lightly, as if to signify that she too had something she wanted to say. In typical Shiemi fashion, once she started to speak, everything just ..sort of bubbled over.

“I don’t know how to exorcise demons…. and I’m not very strong… but…”

Her face scrunched up, in spite of herself. How could she say this?

“If you ever… need someone to talk to about something, you know… I don’t mind listening. I can do that much, at least… “ A pause. “…—but it doesn’t have to be me..! I guess what I really mean is ..if something is truly bothering you, you should really tell someone… alright? Keeping everything to yourself… it’s just..it’s not good for you.”

After all, even she’d done the same thing once… and they both knew how well that had gone over for her.

***

Rin came to a dead halt as Shiemi tugged on his hand, turning to face her with a somewhat confused expression. Of course, it had been unreasonable to expect that even when he goes and says something confusing like that, Shiemi still wouldn’t ask upon it, but the way she started into it was really startling him. What did it have to do — what did anything have to do — with Shiemi not being strong?! Which, on a side note, wasn’t even true! Or so Rin thought somewhat annoyedly — _why can’t you just believe in yourself for once, silly?_ — as he stared down at the girl, his friend.

Despite how garbled the entire thing she was saying was, it still made Rin’s heart skip a beat or two. With that offer, she had possibly already answered the question he had been afraid to ask. And even then, she still wasn’t pushing him to do or say anything; all she did was make an offer. Once more, Rin had to remember the cruel way he had been pushing Shura, and he nearly dropped the umbrella as he reflexively tried to reach into his hair, not wanting to let go of Shiemi’s hand but forgetting his other hand was also occupied. Of course, such a movement ended up showering both of them with all the excess water that had gathered on the top of the umbrella, and Rin suddenly couldn’t decide whether to laugh or be horrified at how lame he was acting.

“Wow, I’m sorry!” he exclaimed quickly, turning the umbrella a bit sideways so the rest of the water poured down into his neck instead of Shiemi’s. “Jeez, that was uncalled for.”

He pulled her a bit closer to himself by the hand he was still holding, so she would be properly shielded from the rain under the umbrella — it was easier to do while they weren’t walking. She glanced over the railing of the bridge once more, but then he looked back at her, right into her bright green eyes full of warmth… and questions. And while the fiasco with the umbrella would have been the perfect opportunity to change the topic, Rin realized Shiemi did deserve him to talk to her.

“Would you do the same?” he finally asked what he had been meaning to ask. Why did he have to be so damn uncertain about everything? It was his failure all the way. Shiemi didn’t deserve the doubt. “If there was something bothering you, and I asked you about it, you’d tell me the truth, right? “You wouldn’t bullshit something just so I don’t worry, right? You wouldn’t, would you, Shiemi?” Though that wasn’t the actual way he had been intending to put it, once he made up his mind, it seemed the words just formed on their own. Feeling more uncertain than ever, he couldn’t bear the surprised look on her face — did he manage to hurt her with that question, after all? —, so he looked away, heat creeping up onto his face.

***

With the way Rin was staring at her now, Shiemi just wanted to crawl into a hole somewhere.

It was hard for her to gauge his reaction at the moment, but inwardly she hoped he wasn’t upset with her. After all, it wasn’t as if he had come right out and said he was troubled by something in the first place. From the very beginning, she had just assumed based on what she had observed. Even if she was correct in her assumption, It wasn’t like he didn’t have other stronger, more knowledgable people he could depend on…. so why did she ever think he would need her for that level of support? Shiemi had thought about this often, and why it was something she was so stuck on was anyone’s guess. Even she couldn’t explain it… she just—

At that exact same moment, a sudden surge of cold water showered down upon the girl’s head and shoulders, and that was enough to leave that thought un-pondered.

Now the both of them were wet… and well, Shiemi was just so overwhelmed at this point that she didn’t know what to do with herself. In another instance, she probably would have burst into laughter at the umbrella mishap, especially with the way that Rin had reacted to it. At the moment, she was just far too strung out between feelings of embarrassment to do anything but dip her head as Rin apologized. If any good had come out of the slip-up, it was that it had been enough to disrupt the internal struggle in her mind for a bit.

When he suddenly pulled her closer to him, she couldn’t help but look upward, her eyes meeting his own. And for that moment, as much as she wanted to, she couldn’t bring herself to look away. On one hand, it was becoming apparent to her that he didn’t seem to be upset after all, and on the other, he still hadn’t really addressed what she had said. In any case, she was rather surprised by the words that next came out of his mouth.

Would she… do the same?

 _That_ was something Shiemi hadn’t expected from him at all. In fact, she wasn’t sure what kind of response she had thought he was going to give her, but what she was hearing certainly wasn’t one of them. Though, what he was asking of her wasn’t much different than what **she** had said just a few minutes earlier. The girl had literally just finished asking him to consider confiding in her, and now that the tables were turned, she had fallen silent.

“I.. just wouldn’t want to trouble you over something silly—” She began to say, gaze averting down to her feet when he glanced away. For a moment the girl was quiet, as if mulling over her next choice of words. “But …if you asked me, I would be truthful about it.” Her fingers tightened a little around his hand as she spoke, though she didn’t look at him. Truth be told, it was hard for her _not_ to be honest with Rin. The tamer girl valued his friendship a little too much, after all. “I don’t have a reason to lie to you..”

***

At the first words Shiemi said, Rin finally completely lost it. So _even Shiemi?_ Why… why did all of them… why. He couldn’t even form the question to himself properly. Betrayal was what flashed on his face, in his eyes at that moment, uncomprehending of her next words as he pushed the umbrella back into the startled girl’s hand, and darted out into the pouring rain, punching his fist against the railing of the bridge with such force that it nearly dented. “What do you mean silly! Who cares? Who cares, goddamnit!? Why do you… why does _everyone_ … why does every person I hold dear…”

Unable to continue, he punched the railing again. He knew that he was probably scaring Shiemi, but at that very moment, he couldn’t do anything about it. The feeling was overwhelming; he just wanted to scream. All of them, the most important people, they all turned their backs and kept everything to themselves, and Rin was just so utterly insignificant and useless at that very moment, both his hands gripping the railing till his knuckles were all white, his bangs falling back over his eyes, and heavy rain dampening him inside-out, streaks of water running across his face.

Long moments seemed to pass in frozen silence while he tried to calm himself, a part of him wondering why Shiemi was just standing there, why hadn’t she run away yet. He was truly acting now like the monster he was. What he had always been.

Yet, since it seemed that she was staying, Rin slowly realized that now he owed an explanation more than ever. He just didn’t know how to start into it. Taking long, deep breaths, he finally calmed himself as much as he could, turning his back against the railing to face Shiemi once more. “If I’m asking about it,” he said through gritted teeth, “it means I wanna know! It means I care! So don’t bullshit me with saying it’s silly! For me, it’s not.” Another pause, another deep intake of breath, and the next sentence was almost inaudible. “Don’t shut me out like that.” _Don’t shut me out like Shura and Yukio do_ , was what he couldn’t say — or perhaps, he just didn’t want to. After all, wasn’t it all his fault? He didn’t want Shiemi to believe any of it was _because of_ Shura or Yukio, when all of it was because of Rin himself. It wouldn’t have been right.

Only when Shiemi finally took a tentative step towards him did he finally realize what her last sentences had been. His lips parting slightly, eyes widening in surprise, he gaped at her, not quite knowing what to say, how to correct himself, after all that he had just rushed upon her. He just couldn’t keep his mouth shut, could he?

Rin had never felt stupider than at that very moment.

***

Shiemi had barely finished speaking when Rin had pulled away from her, shoving the umbrella back into her hands with such force that she had actually stumbled backwards, leaving the girl in a whirl of confusion. Her head was spinning as he began to express his frustrations, simply because she didn’t understand where all of this was coming from. What did she… _did she do something wrong?_ It took the sickening sound of his fist connecting with the railing not once, but twice to pull her back into the reality of the situation.

In spite of everything, at this moment she didn’t see him as some terrible demon on a rampage. It was the same old Rin, but he was hurting. It was apparent in his voice, the way he looked at her, and in every single word that he had directed at her, especially when he repeated what she had said to him. And when she heard it like that, intertwined with the question that he’d initially asked her, she truly did feel terrible for saying it in the first place, as truthful as it was. Hearing it in that context made it seem as though she didn’t trust him, which was as far from the truth as it could get. In the roundabout way she had taken to avoid stepping on his feelings, Shiemi felt as though she had ended up trampling on them instead.

When he finally seemed as though he was calm, she hesitantly took one step, then another, and yet another still. Standing there now, having closed the distance between them, all she could think to do was address the part of her statement that had ignited his outburst in the first place. “...when I said I didn’t want to trouble you, I meant that I wouldn’t want to push my problems on you.. because I know you have your own things to worry about… but I never meant that your support isn’t important to me, I just…” The rest of her statement didn’t make it past her lips. Her voice was quivering so much by this point that she fell silent, unshed tears pooling in the corners of her eyes and threatening to spill over.

How was she going to fix this? All she wanted was for him to believe her.

There was one swipe of a palm against her face and then another, until the umbrella she had been holding was cast aside. No longer hindered by the covering, the downpour made quick work of drenching the girl from head to toe. However, at this moment the rain was the least of her concern. In one swift movement Shiemi threw her arms around Rin’s neck, standing up upon tiptoes to embrace him. Although he had alluded to nothing of the sort, she couldn’t stand the thought of possibly losing him as a friend over something so silly.

“I really did mean it, what I said. You do know that …right? I wouldn’t… I wouldn’t lie to you about something like that…” Her words were muffled by the cover of his shoulder as she clung to him. ”I’m sorry if I hurt you, Rin. I really am.”

***

Rin was completely and utterly stunned. How could he be so painfully stupid? Only now did he fully realize that, preoccupied as he had been with his own thoughts of feeling sorry for himself, he had managed to completely miss the point. Shiemi had exactly given him the answer he had been in need of. She did trust him. And, in turn, instead of listening, he attempted to push it away. His heart leaping into his throat as she stepped closer, he could only hope that he didn’t ruin all of it _again_ , that there was still a way back before everything became thoroughly screwed up.

The umbrella was dropped as Shiemi wiped at the tears trembling in her eyes — at that moment, there was nothing Rin wanted more than reach out and wipe them away himself, but he was so unsure of everything, and he hated himself for it. “Shiemi…” he started, his voice sounding foreign to even himself as he spoke; but Shiemi wasn’t finished with talking yet — and, at the next moment, Rin found himself in her embrace. Barely comprehending what was happening, his arms wrapped around her waist instinctively, his taller figure leaning down so she didn’t have to stand on her toes, and also in hope that he could at least protect her from the rain a little better, even though they were both hopelessly drenched at this point.

“I know…” he said in a low voice, trying his hardest to finally get his thoughts together enough to reassure her. It was evident that Shiemi believed it was all her fault, and Rin could only curse himself for letting her think that, while it was the farthest thing from the actual truth. “Shiemi, it’s not your fault… really… it’s not… I’m sorry for making you think that.”

Glancing sideways at the umbrella on the ground not a mere two steps from them, he suddenly had a thought. Were there anyone else nearby, he wouldn’t have been able to do it, but there was nobody in sight as far as he could tell. So, perhaps for the very first time being glad that he had certain demonic features, he wrapped his tail from around himself where he was hiding it, and reached out for the umbrella with it, dragging it closer till he was able to pick it up with his hand, all the while not letting go of Shiemi with his other arm. Once more, he held it above the two of them, a small grin appearing on his face as Shiemi looked up surprisedly upon noticing the rain had stopped pouring on them.

“I know you didn’t mean it like that,” he said once more, his voice finally gaining back some of his usual confidence — even though he was still ashamed of himself beyond imaginy. “I was just stupid and didn’t pay enough attention. Forgive me, Shiemi…”

***

Shiemi wasn’t sure which shocked her the most, the fact that he’d hugged her back or that he was suddenly apologizing. All along she had been so afraid that maybe he’d push her away or be angry with her, and neither of the two had happened. She looked up from his shoulder, wide-eyed. That meant…

He ….believed her after all!

And when he raised the umbrella back up above them, she couldn’t help but burst into laughter, a mixture of nerves, relief, and just amusement at the situation rolled into one. The both of them were soaked head to toe from being out in the rain, and _**now**_ they had the sense to remember the umbrella. However, as Rin looked down at her with that trademark smile of his, Shiemi found that she didn’t care one bit. If anything, it showed just how irrational they had been acting, and how easily all of this could have been avoided in the first place.

Relieved, she reached up to hug him again, although this time it was much more casual and not as if she were clinging onto him for dear life. He’d asked her if she’d forgive him, and it was all she could think to do. Not that she felt there was anything to forgive in the first place. “You don’t even have to ask that… of course— ” She responded softly, _finally_ releasing him from her grasp. “…but I think you owe the poor railing more of an apology than me.” She said, half-smiling at her own attempt to lighten the mood.

” It’s okay, really…. I think it was just a misunderstanding, for the both of us.”

***

Rin couldn’t help the relieved grin that pulled his lips apart wide as he listened to Shiemi’s reply; almost instantly followed by the faintest of blushes as he realized that he had indeed almost broken the railing of the bridge. He _really_ needed to learn to control himself better.

Finally, for the first time since they’d met up, his shoulders relaxed some as she embraced him again, tenseness slowly fading away as he relished in her newfound cheer. He had been on edge all the time ever since he had realized he’d lost his book, which then lead to so many events tangling in together. As she released him, Rin pulled away slightly, but not far enough to get out into the rain again…

… Except for _some_ parts.

With a somewhat weird expression, he pulled his tail back, stuffing it under his shirt and wrapping it around himself once more. At that moment, his expression changed from concentrating to horrified, and he almost let the umbrella go in surprise as he realized…

“S-So c-c-cold!!” he wailed, turning his eyes towards the sky as his tail, just as drenched as the rest of him — how could he forget about that?! — wrapped around his waist. “… Okay, now I don’t think there’s a single dry part on me,” he exclaimed somewhat sourly, yet still amused at the entire situation. He then looked down on Shiemi, his expression turning softer.

“Alright, let’s get you home…”

***

Shiemi couldn’t help but notice a change as well. But honestly, it was hard not to. The condition Rin had been in when she had come across him earlier was a far cry from how he behaved on a regular basis. Although she knew that everyone was entitled to having an off day, it was still fulfilling to her to see that he was reverting back into a sense of normalcy.

Not that she had much time to dwell on those thoughts anyhow, as his sudden exclamation grabbed her attention. She glanced over at him with a worried stare, though her concern quickly melted into soft laughter when she realized why he had reacted that way in the first place.

“I know how you feel… well, sort of!” She exclaimed, holding up her arms to gesture to her kimono. Her short foray into the rain had left the garment drenched through and through. Of course, it wasn’t anything like she imagined a cold, wet tail against skin to feel, but the heavy fabric certainly wasn’t comfortable either. “Though, I guess it was silly to wear it in the rain anyhow..”

It was when he mentioned home, that she couldn’t help but nod in complete agreement. That’s right, he _had_ been walking her home before all of this. “Alright.” She agreed, beginning to gather the length of her kimono so she could at least keep pace with him. After all, Shiemi imagined he was just as anxious as she was to be able to change into something warmer, not to mention _dry_.

***

Once more, Rin looked over Shiemi, his smile fading only the tiniest amount as he took in again just how drenched she also was. He couldn’t help but agree with the notion that Shiemi most likely did know how he himself was feeling (even if she didn’t have a tail wrapped around her belly), and he also couldn’t help but feel even more guilty, knowing it was his fault that she got so soaked. Were it not for his outburst, she would have never dropped the umbrella…

… Well, there wasn’t much use dwelling on it now like that. As Shiemi voiced her agreement, scooping up the bottom of her clothes, Rin held the umbrella above both of them, and, with his free hand, he grabbed hers, pulling her with him once more, towards the way to the Exorcist shop she lived at, towards safety from the horrid weather. He was so cold that he could barely keep his teeth from clattering together as they ran; the umbrella helped little when they were already both so wet, and he felt his companion slip a few times, only able to regain her balance by being connected to him, getting steadied quickly by the hand he was holding her.

But finally, in little under a quarter of an hour, they reached their desired destination. Tucking Shiemi inside first, Rin snapped the door closed behind them, and practically collapsed against it, laughter bubbling up in him when he reached into his hair and took his hand away with practically a puddle in his palm.

“Well, that was quite the ordeal,” he exclaimed, glancing through the door’s glass to the ever-falling rain, then back at Shiemi. “And I still have to get home somehow… oh man.” It was merely a statement other than a complaint, which his lopsided grin was indicating as well. His earlier foul mood was almost completely gone now — all he felt was infinitely cold, and a bit of worry that Shiemi would fall ill because of him. “Go get into some dry clothes!” he all but ordered her, a strict but warm tone, and a similar expression on his face. It only lasted for a moment, though, and then he couldn’t help laughing again. “I guess it’d be easier to squeeze me like an orange…”

***

Shiemi released a held breath once the two of them finally crossed the threshold of the store. ’I’m home!” she called out, though she didn’t receive a response. The shop itself was dim, and there were no obvious signs of life from the back either. She frowned a little, her gaze trailing back to the downpour that was still falling. ”I guess Mom is out too…. I hope she’s not caught in the rain like we were….” Though, upon hearing Rin’s remarks, her worry was short-lived and she couldn’t help but smile in response. And then, as he began to laugh, she immediately followed suit. After everything that had happened earlier, it felt good to finally be done with it all. “I think that may have been the fastest I’ve ever run, actually…” She chuckled, referring back to their mad dash toward across the campus town.

It was when he suddenly made a mention of her clothes that the girl’s face immediately went red. She had been so happy to finally be out of the rain, that for a moment she actually forgot just how soaked she was. “Ah, R-right!” Shiemi quickly weaseled out of her shoes, rushing toward the back of the shop and out of sight. That was something he certainly didn’t have to tell her twice.

It would be ten minutes or so before she popped back into the main shop area, sporting a dry kimono and a few towels in hand. As Shiemi went to pass him a warm towel, her eyes couldn’t help but stray down to the rapidly growing puddle of water at his feet. ”Um, Rin.. would you like me to get you something dry to change into?” She offered, but before hearing a definite answer, she had already turned away from him, making her way toward the rear of the shop.

Now that she had gotten changed, all of her attention suddenly turned to him. ”I can hang up your clothes near the heater so they can dry some… and then hopefully the rain will let up in the mean time.” She said, now peering around the door frame. To be honest, she was half- expecting him to decline and start to make his way home. Nevertheless, she had to offer. The idea of him venturing back out into the rain without warming up a little didn’t exactly sit well with her.

***

Glad that Shiemi didn’t have any objections, Rin leaned against the door while waiting for her to return, trying to keep himself from shivering. Though it was definitely a lot warmer inside, his clothes were still freezing, sticking to his body like band-aid, as wet as they were.

When Shiemi returned, Rin accepted the towel gladly, dumping it over his head and starting to dry his hair with it, but he still caught the glance she cast towards his legs. Only now did he realize that he had practically been dripping cold water on the floor, and by now there was a puddle gathering under him. An awkward expression on his face, he stepped aside, casting a self-conscious look towards Shiemi. “I can… mop that up, if you want me to?” If he were back at his own dorm, he probably wouldn’t have bothered with it and just let it dry, but this was Shiemi’s wooden floor, to which getting soaked like that probably didn’t do any good.

Upon the offer Shiemi was making, Rin found himself actually stopping for a moment to think. At first notion, he would have been quick to decline; he didn’t want to impose on her like that — and anyways, what sort of clothes could she give him? It wasn’t like he could just sit around half-naked; it would have been indecent, and besides, what if her mother came home and saw his tail? —, but then he caught sight of her worried expression, and he realized he had made her worry enough this afternoon already.

“Yeah… that’d be appreciated, thanks,” he nodded, pulling the two ends of the towel down on his hair, water soaking into it from his black locks swiftly. “Though I doubt it’ll stop anytime soon…” he added, glancing outside again.

Nevertheless, staying a bit and warming up sounded extremely good at that moment.

***

The moment Shiemi realized he was offering to clean up the water that had gathered on the floor, she immediately felt terrible for taking notice to it. “Oh, no. It’s okay! I’ll take care of it.” She exclaimed, quick to try and wave away his concern. “Let me find you something dry to wear first.” Her voice carried out from the other room, as she disappeared from sight to hunt for something suitable.

Moments later, she would reappear once more, this time with a navy blue garment in hand. Seeing Rin still standing patiently in the doorway, another pang of guilt arose for making him wait so long. “Sorry about that, I know you’re probably freezing…” She cast him an apologetic glance, as she walked over to collect him from the front of the store. Another towel would be dropped over the puddle of water at his feet, only to be forgotten as she gently ushered the boy from the shop front and into her actual home. Compared to the cramped quarters of the shop, the innards of the house were actually quite spacious, especially for a Japanese home.

Continuing to lead the way, she would direct him past the kitchen and down a hallway until she’d brought him to a bathroom. Finally holding out the garment to him, she would place it in his hands, followed by two lengthy cords, and lastly a rather long belt of fabric on top. “This yukata looks like it should fit alright.” She said, suddenly looking quite pleased with herself for finding something that she thought was suitable. “You can change here, and then let just me know… so I can get your other clothes starting to dry somewhat.”

Her mind already set on tending to the floor and getting tea started, Shiemi had already begun to hurry back down the hall. For now, it seemed Rin would be left to his own devices.

***

Rin had to hold back his laughter at the way Shiemi was acting — he wouldn’t have wanted to hurt her feelings. Yet, he couldn’t help but find it adorable; and, at the same time, admirable as well. Rin was among the people closest to the blonde Tamer; he knew her well enough to know just how much she tried to be able to help the people she cared for. And that was exactly what she was doing now, and, like that, she was in her element. Once she decided what to really do, there was no stopping her; and so Rin let her lead through the house, a half-smile on his face when they finally arrived at the destination that seemed to be a bathroom (Rin hadn’t paid too much attention to the surroundings as they went), and Shiemi put a piece of clothing into his arms.

After she left, Rin was finally able to get out of his wet clothes. It was a marvelously good feeling to get rid of all the water on him finally. His skin felt unusually cold, and his shivering didn’t subside even when he slipped into the cotton yukata, simply belting it on his waist. Standing there for a couple more moments, wondering if he would ever warm up properly, he couldn’t help but really ask the question whether a half-demon like him could catch a cold or not. He sincerely hoped it was the latter. Out of him and Yukio, Rin was always the healthier one, but he had never paid it much attention.

Finally realizing that standing there like an idiot wasn’t going to help his clothes dry, nor him warm up, he gathered the pile of soaked fabric, and stepped out of the bathroom, looking around. Only now did it occur to him that he should have probably paid attention at the way Shiemi had been leading her. Other than being in her home, he had no idea where he actually was. Rubbing the back of his head, he took a hesitant step in some random direction, wondering whether he should call out to her or not, whether she would actually hear it, or if he was just supposed to go somewhere and hope to find his way back to the Exorcist shop.

If Shiemi had seen him at that moment, she would have probably laughed at the hopeless expression on his face.

***

As if somehow sensing his bewilderment, Shiemi reappeared a few moments later. Having cleaned up the water and already started tea, she couldn’t help but feel a little worried about where Rin was. Though, she breathed a sigh of relief when she found her charge more or less in the same place she had left him. “Rin?” She called, hoping to grab his attention before he wandered off further. As she approached, it wasn’t hard for her to notice he still seemed a bit cold, what with the slight shivering he was doing.

Pausing for a second, the tamer couldn’t help but give Rin a once-over. Up until now, she’d never seen him dressed in anything but the school uniform or casual clothes, so it was a little odd to see him wearing japanese clothing. Despite this, she couldn’t help but think that it looked good on him, though it wasn’t something she dwelled on as she stepped around him to assess the fit of the yukata. At first she was pleased to see that it fit him relatively well, though the longer she stared the more noticeable certain things became to her. What concerned her the most was how he’d fastened the belt, and the idea of him potentially having a wardrobe malfunction because of it was enough to make Shiemi incredibly nervous.

For a moment she didn’t even want to ask, out of fear that she’d make him feel uncomfortable, but she knew it would bother her if she didn’t. ”Do you mind?” She asked, reaching for the soaked clothing he was holding. But of course he didn’t, because she was going to relieve him of them regardless. Placing the clothes aside, she would motion to a spot of fabric at his chest. “Hold this for a second..” Her voice trailing as she reached down to undo the belt he’d incorrectly tied. Having never helped to dress anyone but her mother or even her granny, she was hopelessly embarrassed. Though, what kind of hostess would she be to offer her guest something to wear and then let them be clothed incorrectly?

A **terrible** one, that’s what.

“I’m just going to fix this for you really fast.” she said reassuringly, though she wasn’t sure if she said it more for him or herself. Finally, she untied it so that she could pull it taut and knot it correctly at the back. Less flustered by now, and more concerned with the job she’d done so far, she gathered the remaining pieces.”You can let go now, but I’m going to need you to hold your arms up, okay?” Ducking in the process, she would slowly wind it around him. This time, the length of the belt finished in the front and she hesitated for a moment before knotting it once more, looking up at him for his approval. “This isn’t too tight, is it?” She tried her best to smile at him, although she was inwardly hoping she hadn’t made him feel too uncomfortable.

***

Rin’s first feeling upon hearing Shiemi’s voice was relief. Quick to hide the confusion on his face, he turned towards her, a wide grin spreading across his features. It didn’t last long, though, because as soon as he gave the wet clothes to Shiemi, she put them away to some random place, which Rin didn’t understand. And then she asked him to—

Oh god, _what was actually happening?!_

“What are you—”

Holding the fabric in place where Shiemi told him to, Rin couldn’t help but become incredibly flustered at what Shiemi was doing. It being Shiemi, Rin was fairly positive that she wasn’t about to do anything indecent, but _for Heaven’s sake_ , she undid his belt, and Rin thought he was going to… well, he had no idea what he was about to do other than what he actually did: standing there, red as a tomato, letting Shiemi redo his tie on the yukata.

“N-No… it’s fine…” he finally managed to squeeze out of himself when Shiemi was finished, asking him whether it wasn’t too tight. It felt a lot more comfortable this way, after all. But then, he just couldn’t help it any longer. “Excuse me…” Inwardly cursing at himself — for he knew all too well that he was probably going to upset Shiemi with his behaviour _yet again_ —, Rin turned around, and darted in the way of the shop (now that he had taken note of the direction Shiemi arrived from, it was fairly easy to find his way).

Of course, he wasn’t angry with Shiemi, she hadn’t wanted anything bad, she had been trying to help him — but, to Rin, it was still downright humiliating, and that was altogether a too familiar feeling to him, although the last time it had happened was a good few months before. So what if he _couldn’t tie a tie_ , or hadn’t worn a yukata before?! Why did he have to feel like an invalid? _Uhh…_

Arriving back at the shop, Rin reached into his hair frustrated, glancing back over his shoulder, waiting for Shiemi to catch up. Why couldn’t he just control his emotions today? There was only so much the shy Tamer girl could take, and Rin really didn’t want to make her upset. He only needed a few seconds to calm down, and now he was a lot more ashamed about darting off like that yet again than he had been about the whole clothing business.

***

Just… how many times in one day could she mess up?

The moment she had noticed any inkling that he was uncomfortable should have been the first sign to stop what she was doing. After seeing him dart off like that, although he said it was fine, the tamer knew she had messed up this time. She had been so eager to help him and ..in turn satisfy her own peace of mind, that it blew up in her face instead. Re-thinking the situation, her brows furrowed as if she were about to burst into tears, but instead she just sighed softly. _I’m really not good at this friend thing, am I?_ She thought to herself, taking a moment to brush a few strands of hair away from her face.

All of this made her think back to the conversation she’d had with Bon just the other day, about goals and aspirations. How could she expect to help people as an exorcist if she couldn’t even help someone out as a friend? Only then, when her eyes caught sight of the forgotten clothes on the floor, did she smile brokenly in spite of the situation. Of course, laundry. At least that was one thing she knew she couldn’t do wrong.

So, rather than immediately rush after her friend, Shiemi instead took her time tending to his soaked clothes. She tried her best to wring out as much water as she could, before hanging each article of clothing up to dry near the heater. Satisfied, she’d fetch the tea kettle from the stove and two cups, trying to prepare herself to face Rin again. And when she peaked around the door leading to the shop and saw him there, she knew all she could really do was apologize, at this point.

Silently letting herself in, she placed the items down onto the counter. Again, taking her time in arranging everything, because she wasn’t quite sure what to say. It wasn’t so much that she was upset, but more so that she had upset him and she didn’t enjoy seeing him upset….so actually, she was rather upset.

So, she would step toward him, though she didn’t get too close, thinking maybe he wouldn’t want her to come near him. Head bowed, and hands twisting into the fabric of her kimono, she began to squeak out an apology. “S-sorry… Rin.. I guess I’m just… so used to wearing things like this, I tend to forget that it’s not normal for everyone else.” She said, her tone soft. ” I just wanted to help…but I shouldn’t have done that, …I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”

***

Shiemi was surely taking her sweet time with whatever she was doing — common sense told Rin that she was most likely tending to his clothes, or tea, or whatever else she had started doing while he was changing into a yukata (or more precisely, failing to change into a yukata), but his own guilty conscience just wouldn’t let him let go of the thought that she was trying to delay being in his presence, because he had upset her.

By the time she reappeared, he was sitting on his heels beside the table, looking up into her face as she arranged the tea, even though she still avoided looking at him. Man, had he really screwed up _this_ much? Rin felt like growling — but in view of recent events, that would have been less than advisable… so he settled for tugging his own hair, frustrated to the point of tugging so hard, that at a certain moment, he nearly yelped out loud.

And at that exact moment, Shiemi finally decided to speak; still hesitant, and still not coming closer than a certain distance. And even before the words had begun leaving her mouth, it was enough for Rin to look at her expression to know that she was going to apologize, and he hated it with all his might, because she was apologizing for something that was his fault, and with every word she uttered, Rin just hated himself with a more fiery passion.

The one thing he was completely sure of was that he couldn’t let her continue believing she was at fault. Not for another single second. _Just… no._

And that was how he found himself standing up and crossing the room to her in a matter of a split second, before she even finished talking, and pulling her to his chest with one arm, almost laughing at the surprised little sound she let out.

“I hate it when I can’t do shit,” he muttered in a low voice, fingers encircling her shoulder in a light squeeze. “I hate it when I look like an idiot in front of those who rely on me. I don’t like being useless. That is all.” Perhaps he was exaggerating a bit, but when had he not, when it came to the things really important to him? It was all about getting the point across. “It’s really actually a lot more comfortable like this, so… thanks for helping me out.”

***

Shiemi was so overcome with relief when he embraced her, that she simply leaned her forehead against his chest, hands clutched at her sides. As it sunk in that he wasn’t angry with her at all, she finally moved to hug him back. Although she was glad that he forgave her, in the back of her mind she couldn’t help but wonder how she could avoid making these sort of mistakes in the future. After all, it was the second time that day she had worried that her friendship with him may have been ruined. That feeling of uncertainty was one the tamer would be glad to never experience again.

But it was when he began to speak, that she suddenly wished she could be a little more forceful like Bon or even Izumo at times, because she probably would’ve smacked him upside the head the moment he’d said those things. But as she was neither, ~~and not that it would’ve been a good idea anyhow..~~ Shiemi could only stand there silently soaking in his words. It made her feel a little sad and frustrated actually, that those sort of things even crossed his mind. It especially bothered her that he may have felt any combination of the three in this situation. “You’re welcome… but, you’re not an idiot… or useless… ” She said softly, voice muffled somewhat.

And he may have said something else in response, but Shiemi didn’t quite pick up on it. The way Rin was holding her, she could feel the steady beat of his heart, and he felt nice and warm. Now that she’d relaxed, It was comforting, especially after all that had happened today. Though, perhaps it was a little _too_ comforting. Her eyelids had already drooped slightly, head beginning to loll to the side as she began to doze off— That is, until her body recognized that there was no support and suddenly her head snapped back up, green eyes wide.

_Wha—_

For a moment she stared up at Rin, slightly confused by what had just happened. Then slowly, her expression melted into a smile. Shiemi pushed away from him just a little so she could give him a comforting pat on the shoulder.

“…. I’m sure Kuro will be just fine. Don’t worry. ” She murmured, saying the first thing that came to mind.

That…. is what they had been talking about, right?

***

Rin blinked, completely uncomprehending for a moment. _What just happened?_ He had let go of Shiemi, and she seemed to give a start, as if she hadn’t been expecting it — did he do something wrong? —, and then she said something completely random about Kuro.

 _I didn’t even say anything about Kuro_ , Rin thought, thoroughly confused, but it only took a few seconds to realize that Shiemi probably just hadn’t been paying attention. Rin’s first reaction was to snicker, but he quickly decided against it; there had been enough misunderstandings for today. So he simply shrugged his shoulder, as if they really had been talking about something like that, and swiftly changed the topic.

As Shiemi finally stepped away from him, he rubbed at his arms — he was slowly but surely warming up —, and glanced at the tea she had brought in. “How long do you think it will take for my clothes to dry?” he asked somewhat absently, sitting back down on the ground where he had been sitting previously. Idly, he glanced down at the yukata while he was waiting for her to reply, and wondered how she could tie a perfect knot like that. Hell, he had no idea how he was going to _untie_ it when he would get back into his own clothes…

The rain was still not letting up, or at least that was how it seemed to Rin, from the way it continued to pitter-patter on the windows. He rubbed the back of his hair, still slightly wondering how Kuro of all people had popped into Shiemi’s mind. He himself was a tad bit more worried about Yukio. Gosh, if he wasn’t getting home soon, he was _totally_ going to get chewed out by his brother for not studying enough — again.

***

No, that really hadn’t been what they were talking about…..

As if it wasn’t apparent by Rin’s look of confusion, Shiemi recognized her own slip-up almost immediately. _Did I just say Kuro…?_ She wondered. While she _had_ seen the cat sith the other day, she hadn’t had the chance to mention it to Rin yet, at least not that she could remember. So, why would it come up now? She shook her head slightly, trying to remember what had been said prior to that point. Rin had already settled back down, after more or less shrugging it off. Either he hadn’t noticed, or he was choosing not to address it.

Rather than dwell too much over it, Shiemi instead followed suit, easing into her normal spot behind the counter. It was the first time she’d really gotten to sit down since earlier that morning. Now that they had finally gotten out of the rain and the rush of the day’s emotions had more or less started to wear off, she couldn’t believe just how worn out she felt. Had Rin not been there she probably would’ve fallen asleep right there, as she usually did when sales got a little slow.

When Rin inquired about his clothes, Shiemi snapped out of her reverie. Rubbing at her face with the back of her hand, she was quiet for moment, thinking. “Hmm— … well, I managed to get most of the extra water wrung out. So I don’t think it’ll take that long with the heater going.. maybe an hour or so at the most?” She responded, making a mental note to check on the drying process in a bit. For now, she busied herself with preparing the tea she’d brought out a few moments ago. Carefully setting one of the cups upon a saucer, she began to pour some of the steaming liquid.

“Though if this rain continues, you’ll probably have to hang them to dry again when you get home… ” She murmured, momentarily glancing up and out of the window at the continuous downpour. “I thought maybe it would’ve died down a little bit by no—Ouch!” She yelped loudly. Hot tea splattered everywhere, as Shiemi accidentally overfilled the first of the teacups.

Cringing slightly, she glanced down at her hand for a moment, the skin already beginning to redden from the contact with the hot tea. Though, that was all but forgotten when she noticed the excess liquid cascading across the counter. Quickly grabbing a towel and almost knocking over the cup in her haste, she tried her best to wipe up what she could, sighing softly. “S-sorry about that…. did any of it get on you?”

***

Rin followed Shiemi with his eyes as she settled down as well on the other side of the table, getting ready to pour tea for them. She seemed pretty tired, Rin noticed, wondering what could she have done that wore her out like that. Knowing her, she had probably been running errands all day. Once again, Rin started to feel a bit guilty — here he was, taking her time up while she could finally rest some, and on top of that, what if she had caught a cold because of him?

Well, there wasn’t much he could do about it now — even if he just decided to go home to let her rest, she would have probably become offended. And, well, yeah, Rin wasn’t actually willing to go out into the rain yet again, even less with his clothes still damp. The concept of hot tea also seemed too good to just pass up, and he was hoping the rain would lessen while he was waiting for his shirt and pants to dry.

Oh, and let’s not forget… “I was hoping that perhaps you’d lend me an umbrella… or something…?” he asked, glancing out the window, then back at Shiemi again. “I mean, if the rain doesn’t let up in— whoa!”

Instinctively, Rin backed away from the table in a moment as Shiemi spilled the tea, his eyes widening as she frantically tried to stop the liquid from flowing. She really was tired, wasn’t she? Rin felt even more guilty as he noticed the red stain growing on her hand from the hot liquid that had spilled on her. Kneeling a bit closer again, careful not to actually put his knee in the tea that was slowly dripping down the side of the table into a small pool — it wouldn’t have done any good to ruin the borrowed yukata —, he reached out, taking Shiemi’s hand as she started mopping the tea up, and looked at it closely. It didn’t seem to be burnt too badly, but who could knew? Rin certainly wasn’t an expert at treating injuries. All he could think of at that moment was to blow cold air on it to cool it down a bit, and even then, he couldn’t tell if it was doing any good.

“No, I’m okay,” he replied, letting her go finally. “Go put that under cold water, or something. I’ll mop this up.”

***

Shiemi was so engrossed in trying to wipe up the spilled tea, that she didn’t even notice Rin’s movements at first. When he reached for her hand the girl stopped immediately, partially surprised but mostly embarrassed as he began to examine the small burn. “I’m fi—” she started to say, but quieted as she recalled bits and pieces of their earlier conversation in the rain. If he hadn’t thought something was wrong, he probably wouldn’t have bothered to take a look. She reminded herself. So, she let him, not wanting to insult his concern. If anything, the cooling puffs of air did help to lessen the sting, even if just a little. Though, he had yet to say if he had been burned or if he had gotten wet from the mishap. Her eyes searched his form, looking for signs of either occurrence. Luckily, she didn’t see anything. She would have felt terribly if either had happened and he was focusing in on her first.

However, the moment he did say he was alright and gave the girl orders to go take care of herself, Shiemi sputtered something of an apology and hurried away, taking the tea kettle with her.

Now alone, she could already feel the tears welling up in her eyes. _How embarrassing._ She thought inwardly. Shiemi scrubbed her free hand across her face, knowing that this wouldn’t have happened if she had been paying attention in the first place. It was just like she should’ve asked to help with the yukata or been more foward with her feelings earlier that morning. None of those were things to be crying about, in all honesty. It wasn’t as though Rin had ever gotten angry with her as a direct result of something she’d done. Regardless, Shiemi couldn’t help but be a little frustrated with herself. In any case, it wasn’t as though she could do anything about it right now. So, she set the kettle back on the burner, taking a moment to run cold water over her hand as she gave the tea had a chance to reheat.

Having had her moment to herself, the girl reappeared a few moments later with a freshly poured cup of tea. Setting it down infront of Rin with no incident, she settled back into her seat. The remnants of the earlier spill were gone, wiped away just as he had said he would do. The embarrassment was still there, but she pushed the feeling aside, smiling a little.

“Um.. Thank you for helping me… with cleaning up the tea..” She said finally, breaking the silence between them. “I really should’ve been paying better attention….”

***

Rin didn’t miss the way Shiemi stopped her sentence abruptly, instantly reminded of his own earlier outburst. He had already felt bad enough about it, but when Shiemi finally hurried away, _apologizing_ , even, Rin bit the inside of his mouth so hard that he felt a metallic taste. Did he upset her _again_? Or was it still the same thing? After all, the burn itself wasn’t really a serious one, as far as Rin could tell… yet, she seemed so upset for some reason. Rin really hated seeing Shiemi upset.

While mopping the remainder of the tea up with the towel she had left for the purpose, Rin’s thoughts trailed back to his messed up conversation with Shura. The torn half of the photograph was still in his pocket, and just thinking about it felt like it was burning him. Why did he have to do it? Even if Shura had been acting as if she didn’t give a damn, secretly, Rin was sure that he had hurt her with such an act — and he was ashamed to admit to himself that at that very moment, his _purpose_ had been to hurt Shura.

After finished with the mopping, he reached into his pocket to take the picture out, since Shiemi was still nowhere to be found — only to realize with sudden horror that he _didn’t_ have a pocket. It only took him a moment to remember that he had forgotten it in the pocket of his own clothes, that were currently drying. He felt like hitting himself in the face. The photo was most likely ruined now anyways. Especially after Shiemi squeezed his clothes out. How could he be so stupid?! Earlier, while he had been getting drenched sitting on the edge of the fountain, he had been thinking about returning it to Shura later (… well, if she actually would be willing to talk to him, he realized), but that was most likely impossible now.

So, it was no surprise that, when Shiemi returned, she found Rin in most likely the worst of his moods so far this afternoon; hands clenched into fists in his lap and teeth gritting as he sat beside the table, cursing at his own stupidity. He looked up upon hearing the girl enter, and even mustered a smile, but it wasn’t altogether too convincing. “No, it’s fine, really…” he replied in a low voice. “… Shiemi, where are my clothes?”

***

“Your …clothes?” Shiemi repeated slowly, her gaze fixed on him. “U-um.. I have them hanging up near the heater…in the kitchen..” She answered, her expression turning into one of slight confusion. It was truly odd that they were on the subject of his clothes again. Before she spilled the tea, Rin had asked her about how long they would take to dry. At the time he had seemed satisfied with her answer, so what had changed since then? She hadn’t had a chance to check them, but there was no way they were ready at this point. “—But they’re not fully dry yet…. I mean, they’re not soaked anymore, but still …pretty damp.”

With that said, her eyes trailed to the window for a moment, taking note of the rain still falling heavily outdoors before settling back upon Rin. Although she hadn’t originally picked up anything different about him when she first came back, it was a little hard not to take notice now. The smile still hung on his face, but his body language said otherwise. He just seemed really tense all of a sudden.

And then, something clicked.

It was painfully obvious now, at least to her. Rin was trying his best to be polite, but the reality of the situation was that he probably wanted to leave. Why else would he ask where his clothes were? After taking those few moments earlier to calm herself down, this sudden realization was all it took for the doubt to come rushing back. She really had to have messed up, if he planned to go back into the rain wearing damp clothes. That, above everything else was what really bothered her. So, Shiemi sat in silence for a moment, fingers twisting the fabric of her kimono in her lap.

_What could she say?_

“I-I ..can get them for you, if you like..” She asked finally, already beginning to rise from where she was sitting. There really wasn’t anything else she could do about the situation at this point.

***

Hearing her reply, Rin had already stood up when she offered to bring them. Ha raised an eyebrow as she began to rise. Why would she bring them? Hadn’t she just said they were still damp? “No, that’s okay,” he replied absently, already going in the direction of the kitchen. Thinking back later, he should have probably realized Shiemi completely misunderstood him, but at that moment, he was too preoccupied with thinking about Shura’s ruined photograph to think about anything else.

Nevertheless, despite what he told her, Shiemi still followed him as he went across the house, and were Rin’s mind not full of everything else, he probably would have noticed she wanted to say something. But he didn’t even look back to realize she was there until he reached the kitchen. And even then, he just couldn’t spare a thought, not at that moment. Only much later would he realize how stupid it actually was; being too preoccupied with cursing at himself about how he had messed up things, and meanwhile not realizing that he was just about to mess things up in the present as well.

Reaching up, he tugged his pants down from where it was hung, a hand already digging down into his pockets, searching. Finally pulling out the photograph — or rather, the remainders of it —, he just let go of the pants, and while they fell into a heap in front of his feet, he stared at the completely ruined piece of paper. He could hardly make out the contours of what was supposed to be his father’s figure.

“I’m such a fuck-up…” he mumbled, fingers running across his slowly drying hair. He only realized he had said that out loud when he suddenly realized Shiemi was standing right beside him. But then, he had no idea how he was going to explain himself now…

***

If the situation wasn’t confusing enough already, Rin’s sudden change in behavior only added to it. When he declined her offer of bringing the clothing to him, the girl had opened her mouth to respond, only to close it abruptly. Though it wasn’t his response that rendered her speechless, but the fact that he actually got up on his own accord and started toward the kitchen himself. But why? Hadn’t she just offered to bring them directly to him? Without a second thought to her own actions, Shiemi followed.

However, catching up with him proved more difficult than she had originally thought, as the half-demon navigated his way through the house as if he were on a mission. And although Shiemi did try several times to gain his attention, Rin seemed not to notice at all. In fact, it wasn’t until they reached the kitchen that he seemed to become more aware of his surroundings. For a moment, she simply hung back in the doorway, still throughly confused.

She watched silently as he retrieved the pants from where she had hung them, and Shiemi was sure he was going to ask about where he could change… —well that is, until he tossed the article of clothing onto the floor. _But.. why..?_ She wondered, taking that moment to move closer. Though, it was the comment he made, not the pants that troubled her the most. In all of her time knowing him, the girl had heard colorful word choices escape Rin’s mouth on more than one occasion. However, that didn’t make it any less shocking to hear, especially when he was using it to refer to himself.

“…Rin?”

The girl glanced down to the pair of pants on the floor, though Rin seemed to be preoccupied with something else entirely. He was holding _something_. What it was, she couldn’t quite tell, what with the way he was standing with his back to her. First, Shiemi bent down to retrieve the clothing at his feet, tugging the damp pair of pants into her arms. Then hesitantly she reached over, fingers hovering for a second before pressing down gently onto his arm. She really didn’t understand what was going on with him, but it seemed to be a lot bigger than her previous assumption.

“Is…. everything alright?” She asked softly, peering up at him. “…did something happen?”

***

Staring at what was left of the figure of his father on the washed-out piece of torn paper, Rin couldn’t see anything else other than Shura’s frustrated-disappointed face, the way she had hidden her sadness from him, behind her anger that he well deserved. He still had no idea what to do, if there was any way to make it right again. At moments like this, when everything seemed to collapse over his head, Rin couldn’t help but realize how much of a trouble his hot-headedness actually was. But then, usually he did the same thing all over again next time. It was just the way he was. Such changes don’t happen in a day.

All of a sudden, he became aware of Shiemi’s fingers on his arm, her gentle squeeze. He looked up, only to see distress on her face yet again, and it didn’t take an awful lot to realize he was still the cause. Staring at her practically speechless, he tried to recall the previous few minutes; his mad dash across the house, with her right at his heels, and the events that had occurred before that; her spilling the tea and becoming upset over it, then offering to bring his clothes when he asked—

Dear God, had Shiemi thought he wanted to _leave_?

“I…” For a moment, he was completely out of ideas. What could he say, really? He couldn’t even count now how many times he had upset her just today. And yet, she was here, asking about what bothered _him_ , no less? The elder Okumura twin couldn’t help but wonder what he had done to deserve such a friend as Moriyama Shiemi was to him.

He swallowed, then tried again. “I’m sorry for making you worry. I’m okay, just—”

And then, he fell silent again, gazing down on the photograph. Man, was he really this much of a hypocrite? It had just been a little more than an hour before that he had blown up at Shiemi, telling her to not keep stuff to herself if he is asking about it, because it felt really lonely. And now, he was doing the same thing to her? Hell no. _Come on, you idiot_ , he scolded himself, lips pressed firmly together for a moment before he spoke again with a small sigh.

“I got into a really stupid argument with Shura,” he admitted in a low voice. “It’s all my fault, and I have no idea how to make it right… that’s about it, yeah…”

***

_So that was what happened?_

“Rin!”

Dropping the pair of pants in her haste, Shiemi’s grip on his arm tightened just a little bit. Being rough or forceful even, had never been one of the girl’s strong points, but she couldn’t stand to see him look so hopeless about the situation. And on the other hand, the thought that the two of them might have something of a rift between them didn’t quite sit well with her either. Of course, now that she had his attention, for a moment she didn’t even know exactly what she wanted to say.

“Just…. just tell Sensei that you’re sorry!” She blurted out, staring up at him. Everything that happened previously in the day seemed to fade away, the yukata, the tea, the misunderstandings, because there was no reason for the girl to guess at what was bothering him anymore. At least now, she felt as though she had some sort of idea of how to help him.

—that is, until she realized that she too had dropped the pair of pants onto the floor for what would be the second time that day. With a yelp, she released him and scrambled to retrieve them. At the rate they were going, his clothes were never going to dry properly. Finally standing back up, Shiemi was blushing profusely. Rin hadn’t asked for her opinion about the matter _at all_ , but she felt like she had to do….to say _something_. “I-I mean.. if you don’t, you’ll regret it ….right?” she asked softly, echoing the very same words he’d said to her just months ago.

***

Rin lowered the photograph (or rather, the remains) as Shiemi grabbed onto his arm. Somehow, having said it out loud to her made it sound different; it didn’t feel so excruciating anymore. And the way she replied, using his own words, no less, it just… looked so simple. And although Rin still had many worries — would Shura even accept an apology, would she even _talk_ to him to begin with —, standing here in Shiemi’s kitchen, with her holding on to him tightly — frankly, Rin didn’t remember Shiemi having ever gripped him so tightly, not even when he had had to carry her through a pit of bugs —, he was able to believe that it might work out, somehow.

“Yeah… you’re right…” he replied softly, the small smile appearing on his face indicating that he did remember the time he had given the exact same advice to Shiemi, and that he was grateful to hear those words from her; not only because they applied to this situation, but because it was reassuring to know that she had understood and remembered it even till now.

He reached out, pulling his pants out of her hand and hanging them up again; it was only slightly damp now, he guessed he could put it back on in a matter of a quarter of an hour. He crumpled up the ruined photo, stuffing it into his pocket. And then finally, he turned to face Shiemi again, and he took one of her hands in his, squeezing it lightly. “Thank you, Shiemi,” he murmured; and he didn’t only mean this one advice, but the entire afternoon; how she found him on the edge of the fountain, fallen apart, how she picked him up, how she stood her ground by him even when he lashed out at her, how she offered him clothes and tea and _warmth_ and her friendship that he held more precious than anything, right at this very moment. And that feeling was written on his face as he wrapped his fingers around hers, his eyes softening.

***

Shiemi’s eyebrows raised immediately at Rin’s words.

What she said…had actually helped?

Having let go of him by now, her eyes followed his movements as he crumpled the photo remains and then proceeded to stuff it into his pants pocket. What was _that_? Shiemi had noticed he’d been holding something from the start, but in the midst of everything else, she even hadn’t thought to ask. Though even now, she still didn’t get a chance to, her attention wavering when he turned back around to face her. And then when he _thanked_ her, taking up her hand in his own, for a moment all she could do was stare at him, still somewhat unbelieving that doling out his own advice had been so helpful.

“O-oh, you’re welcome!” She finally sputtered out, the slightest hint of red beginning to creep back into her cheeks. “I mean…it really wasn-“

However, her voice trailed off as she glanced down at his hand laced around hers, as if suddenly noticing something. After a second or two, she reached down for his other hand, her small palms dwarfed by his larger ones as she felt at them. “Ah, Rin.. your hands are still cold…” She exclaimed suddenly. Although common sense would suggest it was due to the damp clothing he’d been holding, Shiemi didn’t waste any time trying to figure out hows or whys. Since the former issue had been more or less resolved, making sure he was warm was now the first thing on her mind.

Tugging lightly at his arm, the tamer turned away from him as if to lead him back to the front of the shop. “Come sit, so you can warm up again! and I’ll get you some fresh tea, alright?” This time when she turned back to look at him, the underlying worry that had plagued her from the start of the day seemed to have gone. Instead, all that showed on her face now was a soft smile.

**Author's Note:**

> Rin's argument with Shura that he keeps referring to is also written; I can publish it upon request, or provide the link to the original thread, just message me about it. Thank you for reading!


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